The weeks go by too quickly for my liking. Now it is Saturday night, and it feels like Sunday was just yesterday. A lot has happened this week though, in many aspects. I got my first couple 100%'s in school as well as a 99%, I learned of several massage field trips that I will be going on. The first is coming up this coming Wednesday the 21st for a blood drive in Concord. The Second will be the following Wednesday for the NHDOT, and the other will be happening at Hampton Beach for the Race to the Beach Relay...which is a 200 mile relay race from Cannon Mountain to Hampton Beach...or something like that. Either way, I get to practice what I have learned thus far, and that is an exciting thought.
Other than that, the girl that I have been trying to get to open up with people has finally been opening up...a tiny bit. She is a small, shy and anxious person...kinda like me a few years ago. I'm excited to see how this next week will go. A couple of others have taken to me as well...actually, everyone seems to like me...oddly enough. But I tend to stay with the older crowd...what that says about me, you decide.
In other news, I think that I may be coming down with something which is BAD BAD BAD BAD!! I can't afford to get sick during school...I wan't to get my Perfect Attendance award at school...and maybe even High Honors or Director's List...only time will tell...but for now, I CAN'T get sick!! I won't let it happen.
Sorry for the choppiness of the post...my mind is everywhere and Im just trying to empty it...since I don't have people to talk to physically in person. That is another reason I can't wait for Monday and school, I get to see and talk to people...whereas on the weekend, there's nuthin'. and that sucks. Today for example seemed to last FOREVER! I mean I hate that it's only 9:10 PM...that means that I still have 3ish good hours until I start feeling tired.
I am planning on moving out of the Northeast sometime in the next few years...right now, possible destinations include... the three west coast states, Arizona, or Florida...specifically, Oregon, Washington, California, Arizona, Florida...in that order.
There just isn't anything left for me up here in the Northeast...nothing but painful memories and heartache...don't get me wrong, there have been some wonderful memories made up here...but that is all they are...memories of a time gone past. But yeah...I plan on moving sometime.
And that brings me to my next subject. For the past couple of weeks, this song really seems to be me:
I guess its because, for the past few weeks, I seem to be doing ok, I try to hold my head up and smile and act all confident and chill and whatever. But after a while, I just collapse on myself. I know I shouldn't let things get like this but it is REALLY hard with the military training that I have had to just suck it up, hold it all in, show no weakness...Its ingrained in me, indoctrinated in my very being. I try to talk to people, but it feels like complaining or that people will think less of me. Again, I know this isn't the case, but it's programmed.
I may have a rough exterior with the cold eyes, and stern demeanor, but that is just the outer appearance. But really, I'm a quiet sensitive individual...as much as I hate to admit it. I had more to say...but for some reason, it escapes me.